A religious woman buys a parrot…

A religious woman buys a parrot and takes it home. As soon as she gets the bird in its new cage, it starts hollering, "I'm a whore! I'm a whore!" The lady is embarrassed and asks her minister if she should return the foul-mouthed bird. The minister suggests, "I have a well-behaved male parrot who sits in its cage and prays all day long. Perhaps if we put your bird in with mine, your bird will see the error of its ways and become more pious." The next day, the woman takes her parrot to the minister's house and puts her bird in with the praying parrot. After a few seconds, her parrot starts saying, "I'm a whore! I'm a whore!" The priest's parrot replies, "Come on in honey, that's what I've been praying for!"
Jokes, +1:
A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her that it's still experimental. He tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner, so that night, she does just that. About a week later, she’s back at the doctor, where she says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you said! It wasn't five minutes later that he jumped up, raked all the food and dishes onto the floor, grabbed me, ripped all my clothes off, and ravaged me right there on the table!" The doctor says, "I’m sorry, we didn’t realize the pill was that strong! The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages." "Nah," she says, "that's okay. We're never going back to that restaurant anyway."